If Zelensky asks, I’ll write how you can improve the lives of parents-guardians

Если Зеленский спросит, я напишу, как можно улучшить жизнь родителей-опекунов

The lives of children, left without parents, is like life on another planet. Everyone knows the word “orphan”, “orphan”, “the orphanage,” “adoption,” “guardianship,” but think about their value only when the media pop up horrific cases. For example, when teachers bullying of children or the orphanages are in the midst of the scandal.

Recently, President Vladimir Zelensky voiced statistics – 100 thousand children live in orphanages. In the next five years they want to identify in the family and it is the intention of the state seems quite doable. However, the families wishing to adopt a child, should inquire about this possibility.

The family of Anna of Chernigov and IBIS, Semiletko behind – 15 years of support graduates of boarding schools, in General, more than 80 people, eight weddings and two dozen grandchildren. They have three children, the youngest of whom is four years, three children under the care and 14 children, which the couple helps to adapt to adult life, and their cozy house, where still lives a funny black dog Jordan and the cat similar to funny ant farm. Everything here is made by the hands of the Pope – he added onto the house over the garage, he collected the bed, he repaired. Antiques, ceramics, collection of cameras, sculptures of metal, door handles of all that comes to hand, a secret storeroom where you store products which you can not eat while mother is not allowed, fridge in almost every room in this maze you can walk forever.

In a small parents ‘ bedroom, completed near the veranda with a stove and a high sleeping place in the palaces of French kings, on the wall attached photos of the children who lived in the home for 15 years. “Our Valera, Ivan and Igor”, – recognizes familiar faces 4-year Bogdanchikov.

When we talked about the interview, Anna was asked not to make them heroes. How the couple met, when they started to help children from boarding schools and what to do when you are really serious, Anna of Chernigov told “Vesti”.

– When I was planning for you to go, remember the movie with Jean Reno and Juliette Binoche. Their characters met by chance, and when the woman talked about her life, said, “It was the height of cowardice to be afraid to have a baby one,” and the man replied “This is the height of cowardice to be afraid to have a baby together.” Please tell us how did it start?

– It’s hard to remember how it all began… We became parents and realized that I can give to these children. We went to arrange the boarding schools in the camp, we saw that the children change when you live with them. More than when you just come and make a good program. And if a child came into our family, we try to become our fully, even if he is an adult.

We are often told that older children will not do anything. They say they are – formed personality, character formed and influence almost impossible. This is actually not true. Because it can be influenced at any age, especially family when is father and mother.

We have three biological children, 14 children live here, eight of the weddings we had our children (pupils – “News”.) got married. Two families of our children also take kids from the orphanage to his, only smaller age. More than 80 children have passed through our house.

– How you and your husband meet?

– More kids when we were 15 years old. I’m from the Kyiv region Chernobyl area, and Bogdan – from Mironovskiy district, we were in a sanatorium in the Carpathian mountains, he is my class, I do mine, then parted, were rewritten as children, and then I finished University, and Bodya served in the army and wrote me a letter in five years. The year corresponded while he was in the army, and then he came back – started Dating and after a year got married. Bogdan, when we were thinking of moving here, and wondered what was waiting for us. And I replied: “Boda, never be bored, never.”

– How planned is your day?

On Saturday everyone that wants something and does. On weekdays, Wake up and eat Breakfast at different times, because some were couples, others go to school. In this house live on the second floor girls, there are two rooms where they live, medium boys, older boys in another house. An age that all live separately… when all return, starts the fun: we ate, walked, worked. Sure someone helps in the kitchen. I cook with someone from children that they also studied, because it seems to be adults come to us from boarding school, but can’t do anything.

– How to come up with a menu, maybe someone expresses their preferences?

– Of course, adjust. My principle – the least money, high utility, high taste. The hardest part is the kitchen. To figure out what to cook every day for a family difficult.

We have, thank God, all dress up and eat, but it’s an endless monotonous work more than my mother, because my dad is a repair, to go somewhere, to buy products. It is always large-scale purchases, and the house we have old.

On New year’s prepared – you never know how many will be children. 50, 30, 40? We specifically does not planting in the garden, we are all there to celebrate the wedding, because to rent a room is extra money, it is better that we prepare. All weddings we have in the garden, Boda welded itself the arch, photo zone do yourself, wedding have required, is that in the garden venchem.

– How do you determine what abilities children have and how you develop them?

– We know about the children from the orphanage. We talk a lot with teachers, with children, with whom they are friends. Even if the child is 17 years old, we still try – and the guitar, and drawing. My girlfriend, for example – designer, she draws them for free, because we never would have paid all courses. My husband plays the guitar and can teach children. It can show how the tree work.

We try to teach children to be patriots, but most importantly – to teach to think, to analyze, and was not indifferent to what is happening.

When children come from orphanages and boarding schools is a disaster. They don’t know where to go, what to do? To return to her parents, which was taken 17 years ago? It happens that the house is, and the parents in prison or died of an overdose. Often they have nowhere to return, so begin to survive, begins the crime. Statistics are terrible for older children.

– Explain the difference between guardianship and adoption?

– Adoption is the child takes your surname, it completely becomes yours legally, it does not have the right to take from the family, and guardianship – for example, we passed the school, formally all documents are prepared, we took the children for a certain period – until they turn 18, then they can either leave, or remain in the family at the request of the parents, but they can be adopted – if any family in Ukraine wants to adopt these children, they can take from us. But, in our experience, adult children no one adopts. My band, where I studied for parents, guardians, nobody wanted children older than 10 years, except me.

– The government helps you?

– When adopting, you take full financial responsibility and care must state on each child to highlight to parents the minimum wage.

– What should be the first step for people who want to adopt a child?

– The first thing you need is a consensus of both parents, because it often happens that the wife wants but husband does not want, or Vice versa. If there is no unity in this, it’s not advised to take the baby because it’s hard. I wish people would take the children from the orphanage, but you never tell me that it’s so amazing that it is such a Paradise that you will just have to live and enjoy. At any age – or is it the baby or is an adult child, it’s not easy. The process of adoption is a difficult time.

– Many are afraid of this path – the documents, the selection process, the nerves…

– In fact, the laws are built so that for the period until you draw up the documents, should not work. For example, a school that two months is held on Saturdays. If you ever miss, you do not give a certificate that you can be parents-adoptive parents. The adoption process is very complicated, but if a couple there is desire and unity, we can overcome. I would advise, first and foremost, talk to each other, so it was a mutual desire.

– When President Vladimir Zelensky met with the adoptive parents, in social networks, there were many suggestions how to improve the provision of the parents, adoptive parents and guardians. Was a complaint about public services, taxation and benefits travel and much more. What suggestions do you have?

– From the state, we do not depend on. 15 years we were completely on your support, financial help from friends, parents, and my husband and I work periodically when there is a possibility. Only in the past year, three of our under the tutelage, we began to receive support. We were refused the subsidies, not even explained why. 10 years ago social services asked me to order a social hostel – this is when there is mom and dad, but they are called teachers, receive salaries from the state, but also the minimum, and 10 of the kids of different ages. We refused, because we first build with the children and then pick up the family. We do not agree, respectively, have no support from the state is absolutely all these 15 years.

For us it would be a big help, for example, utilities, we have two larger houses, and for us it is very expensive, in winter we have gas heating, and you can see the prices. So we put the little stove everywhere and so save a little of it, and before the heating season does not turn on the gas because the bills are such that it is terrible to watch. We would be glad if the government at least partially compensated.

This year, we first gave each child 500 hryvnia from the President. This is something. Candy we have the money to buy, but the whole family go to the movies.

I watched this meeting of the President with the adoptive parents, and I personally know two families who have adopted children, others were Directors of some organizations, “people with shoulder straps”, and I don’t know, did they ever orphans with my own eyes.

We do not regret and have never regretted that it is so. There was a time when we are so tired that you almost divorced, but we are people of faith, and the Lord will give us strength, so we’ll be here. We are asked often: “don’t You worry about the children over at the orphanage?”, here starts this program (voiced by Vladimir Zelensky – “News”.) and no children in the orphanage. Children will never end and will always be. Now, for example, we have guys who have no status as orphans, they have parents, and children want to learn, so we take them to her without any documents. About the fact that children will not, I do not worry, kids come to us, we are not looking for them.

You’re an extraordinary family.

– I don’t know, I feel like we’re an ordinary family, just living conditions we are interesting. I think we very rich parents, is happiness really is. We always laugh that when in old age are left without pensions, as we are with Bogdan never worked officially, if every child will be reset to 10 hryvnia, then we will live old age comfortably. To work constantly at us simply is not possible. We have friends from Lithuania, and they joke that if we lived there, we would be millionaires, because the state helps people who take children.

And we all should be his. Even the money that we allocate for children in care, is the minimum wage for each child, support the child on them is impossible, especially an adult. To clothe, to feed, to the doctor reduce is unrealistic for three thousand. If Zelensky me personally asked, I would have written a list of how to improve the lives of parents-caregivers and adoptive parents, but if it is easier parents, and the children well.